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23. NOLIFE
On the tenth day of enduring the Re-Legion, Elfen got his wish.
As the voyagers came around a protruding rock in the wall—that if no torches were lighting the way, into the obstacle they would've surely crashed—they noticed a woman standing on the edge of the water. She waved to them, surprising both the sailors. They noticed it was not a friendly wave, but a wave to attention.
The shore at this point was sandy, giving ease to beach the vessel. The edge of the river formed a lagoon, cut into the giant wall towering on their right. Elfen stopped the Mona Fidelity at the beginning of the U-shaped pool.
Across the lagoon, on the other side of the water inlet stood the woman. A string of torches lit the half circle, so seeing could be.
Elfen climbed out of the boat—not suspicious, as his companion was—and walked around the pool, to where the woman waited.
Though suspicion did not exist in the Children of the Glimpse, Freegirl was learning caution as she had never known, and decided to stay on board—to observe the meeting from the deck.
Upon arrival, Elfen reached his hand to clasp the hand of the woman, but she did not receive the human touch, and nodded her head only.
In the torch lights, Elfen was able to see the dweller of the Re-Legion was very thin and frail. She had no color, though she appeared to be shaded of the white race. Her skin was dry. It was hard to tell her age. She seemed a thousand years old, so wrinkled was her covering—though it was his first time seeing an elder wrinkled. The bones underneath her skin protruded. She stood hunched, her body crooked. Her hair was long and pale, thinning, and very unkempt.
The look in her wide eyes was severe and without sparkle, and pierced the giant dark circles—the pupils through which her cold heart smoldered, and fixed upon Elfen.
The old woman’s look sent a wave of ice, cutting and slithering through the Rower of the Rivers’ body—chilly, and scary.
A tattered blanket was placed upon the ground, and Freegirl watched under cover as the strange woman gestured to Elfen to sit. In a voice that scratched the surface of the lagoon and reached Freegirl’s ears, the woman spoke with a rasp. “My name is Nolife.” She paused for breath. “I am called No.”
He tried not to react to the negativity of her name, and responded politely. He said his name was Elfen.
She was uninterested. “I have known of your coming since you reached the entrance of the Re-Legion. Though we are obviously sick, we are not stupid…and many of us have premonition.”
She was nervous, and fingered slowly the strings that hung from the frayed garment clothing her.
In her raspy voice, she continued. “In fact, when the body becomes weak and ailing, the mind becomes more powerful. I do not get much energy from the food I eat. I receive energy by consuming the will of others. That is how I stay alive.”
Elfen momentarily could not look at her, for what he heard was a plague of absurd ideas. He scooted his rear end on the shabby cloak under him, then asked, “Do you read minds?”
"Possibly. I suck the will from those who are weak.”
Elfen was flabbergasted. He pictured sucking the will of another as predatory. A mind feeding on a weak will was like a Predator feeding on prey.
None of her words made sense.
When he tried to inquire about the reality of this, No became fretful.
“I am offering this information against the advice of the others. Please listen. Do not doubt what I tell you. It is my belief that if you know the truth about us, you will tell your kind not to bother us. Find other routes—we don’t like visitors.”
“May... I ask... you a question?” Elfen requested slowly and carefully—a deliberate politeness the old woman caught, so as not to lose his chance to be told her story.
No nodded affirmation.
“What is so terrible about people outside the Re-Legion?”
The haggard woman was not without personality. She looked at Elfen with a sidelong glance, expressed a sly grin, and then with a sneer on her lip and sarcasm in her voice, she answered, “Because people outside the Re-Legion insist upon changing us!” She lifted her chin with a touch of arrogance and added in a hard tone, “We don’t like change.”
Freegirl, on the deck of the Beast, thought change is inevitable, you fool.
Elfen wanted to continue asking questions, but Nolife knew it, and avoided his eyes.
Her story continued. “There were twelve great Images known as the Waylords, who came to live in the Re-Legion, three thousand years ago. At that time, this cave was called the Vein.” Slowly with effort, and breathing excessively, she resumed. “The Waylords had been chosen by the Images for their exceptional powers. They were so in tune with the universe, their physical bodies shimmered like light. They could control the star constellations by altering its position, or they could reflect a star’s light back to itself, to alter its resonance. If the lights of heaven did not send perfect waves to the planet, the Waylords changed the star arrangements and, basically, controlled the sky.
“For one thousand years, the twelve Waylords lived in this tunnel.” The old woman peeked through slits—sagging wrinkled eyelids at Elfen. “They rarely left the cave. Life for them was experienced in the Dreamscape.
“A thousand years later, the discovery of a new planet shifted their attention from the stars. Speed was the name of the new heavenly body, which soon became their primary focus. Because of the attraction of Speed and the energy required to travel to it, the Vein was neglected, and the stars resumed their original paths.”
Elfen was surprised to discover Nolife had so much knowledge, for he too knew the history of the Waylords, the Vein, and Speed.
The old hag coughed, then blew her nose into a filthy rag. “Well, in the excitement of Speed, the Vein was forgotten, and for reasons unknown, the Waylords vanished. The Images could not find them anywhere, and the Children felt abandoned. Because this disappearance had such a strong impact , our new calendar system was started.”
(And so it was in the year of 1987 A.D., Freegirl’s adventure to the Lore Halls had begun, 1,987 years after the disappearance of the Waylords. The year of their vanishing was called 1 A.D., after disappearance. B.D. meant before disappearance.)
Nolife continued. “Because the Children were gaining more and more power, the need for additional Waylords ended, and the Vein was ignored for many centuries.”
Elfen nodded, as No spoke.
In a rough and sinister tone, slowed for affect, and heated with a grimace, the woman said, “Then came the wild Image known as Innos.” She watched Elfen to see if he was becoming nervous, but the state of the man was concern and curiosity, more than it was fear.
“Innos preferred working in total darkness, so was drawn to the dark, empty tunnel. She claimed the shadowy cavern—all six hundred miles of it—for her own.
"The other Images did not share her beliefs for working without light.
“But this Image was different. She had a great curiosity for the unusual. ‘Why must everything always be in the light’, she asked ‘when the darkness, too, has power.’
Eventually, the other Images left her alone.
"Meanwhile, in her dark realm, she found destructive forces created by beings from less intelligent worlds.”
Nolife snorted and sniffed. Her stiff, crooked body shifted on the blanket. “These destructive forces lived in the hearts of humans who had never learned the power of Self. The mortals, as they saw themselves, suffered, and deteriorated with age. If they lived a century it was some kind of miracle. Most died very young. The forces which they had created— and by which they had become imprisoned—were known as Fear, Anger, Guilt, and Jealousy. Fear was their God, and it gave life to the other three forces.”
Elfen pondered. Guilt…Anger…Jealousy…These were concepts for which he had no definitions. He had no idea what the feeling of guilt was, for everything he did was true. He did not understand the feelings of anger because he had patience, and accepted things which were beyond his control. Jealousy he could not begin to fathom, but he watched animals behave towards each other, and knew how they could become possessive. He knew they could become angry, and even have guilt.
But Fear was a feeling related to threats from Predators, or severe storms. It was no God. Imagine misplacing a power like Fear and thinking it was a God. These humans must have been incredibly weak and without sight.
“Indeed,” No responded, and Elfen realized she had just read his thoughts. “The people who gave birth to these emotions lived in another galaxy, long, long ago. For them, Fear was something to covet; otherwise Boredom would kill them. They also coveted Domination—they thrived on controlling others—and used Fear as their weapon."
Suddenly the wrinkled woman’s face contorted. “A-hok! A-hok! A-hok!” Nolife had a temporary coughing fit while Elfen cringed. The watching Freegirl, back on the Mona Fidelity, tuned her ears in closer. This blatant lack of health supported her Vision, and enhanced her desire to find the Images.
Momentarily, Nolife sniffed and resumed. “Because Innos did all her work in the dark, she became confused. She thought Guilt, Anger, and Jealousy had potential in the world of Power. So, here in the Vein, alone, she reproduced these ancient human emotions.
“When the other Images discovered what she was doing, they tried to stop her. The council of Images decided Innos was interfering with human evolution, for to recreate destructive forces—like Fear and its offspring—was regressing. It threatened the life force, and it threatened survival.
" But clever Innos argued these newfound emotions were forces of Change.”
No began to emphasize with her hands and dangling dirt rag. “The other Images said anything born of Fear was illogical, and backward change. De-evolution. To oppose the Images, Innos mentally attacked her disbelievers by switching the subject. She accused the elder Images—who live in their bodies for thousands of years—as ones who interfered with Death—and if they could interfere with Death, then she could interfere with Life.
“The Council decided Innos was insane, for to them, Death did not exist. Death was merely a transition to be experienced by choice.” Nolife blew her nose again, the tattered rag clutched tightly in her hand.
“So Innos was banished from Photopia. She was asked to leave politely and responded in kind, as she was outnumbered. It was during her time the unusual storms began. As she left around 1500A.D. it is believed she cursed the Vein with the three offspring of Fear. She bled Anger, Guilt and Jealousy into the waters.”
No coughed and cleared her throat, rather loudly. “Innos is still around,” she said with a glint, mischievous and wicked, her eyebrows lifting slowly. “She lives in other dimensions, but as other dimensions are part of the same Web... she sneaks back sometimes.”
Elfen was silent. The thought of some power, an Image, who believed Fear was a God, and ideal to life, was staggering. Some power beyond Photopia, but not beyond the solar system, was out there. And she could still enter Photopia's force field. An Image that was extremely old and adept, a creator of destructive ancient emotions —feelings dangerous to evolution and harmony—lived freely within a realm unknown! And Nolife seemed proud of this fact. Proud of some crazy Image who might have the capacity to destroy the balance!
The Rower of the Rivers looked up slowly and met Nolife’s beaten eyes. “Are you with me?” she asked, mysteriously.
The poor man wanted to shout, Of course I’m not with you! Do you think I’m nuts! But with great composure and a deep breath he replied, “Yes, I am with you. Innos was banished from Photopia for recreating unnatural fear and its offspring.”
“Yesssss…” No seemed deep in thought for a moment, then she began her explanation again. “Though she was banished, the forces she reproduced remained. Those emotions live here still.”
She gazed at Elfen with guarded eyes. Then her eyebrows lifted in an ironic expression, as she asked him, “You can feel them, can’t you?”
Elfen was quiet. Glancing to the side while shifting in his seat, the wrinkled old woman interrupted him before he had a chance to answer.
“Pah!” she blurted, as her hand whipped the dangling rag through the air. “Hungrylamb could feel them! Around 1500 A.D. he made his way here. His leg had been broken, and he discovered an amazing thing—he could not heal it! It should have healed in a stroke of moments, as you must know.” The last remark was slurred with an offensive voice, and a rude facial tone.
Elfen frowned, not to be rude, but her accusing expression and tone made no sense.
She ignored his discomfort, and continued. “Weeks after his injury, Hungrylamb was still in pain and limping. Not a soul could help him, although the healers set the bone and did many medicines, none could get the mending to commence. The poor man became so despondent he told his family he was leaving to go to the Vein; for he’d been getting a calling, he said.
"Most people knew about the bizarre storms surrounding the cave, but few knew the history of Innos, and what she had done. They figured the storms were harmless. Still, his family tried to stop him from leaving, but he was persistent, and eventually, at his request for privacy, he was brought here.
“Then, little by little, more humans began having healing problems, and like Hungrylamb, they also got a silent summons to come to the Vein. These diseased Children and their new home in the tunnel were kept secret, for their family members thought the weird lack of healing might spread. The new dwellers of the Vein asked for complete obscurity, and this desire was respected.
“The Sell Fab Users, as we call ourselves, bred and gave birth. Our offspring also cannot heal when injured. From infections of the wounds, we began developing blood diseases. We now give them to our newborns.”
Elfen was beginning to feel nauseated, but forced his ears to listen.
“Not one of us ever leaves the darkness, for the light gives us the ability to see our sickness. Being sick depresses the soul, and the darkness comforts.” No smiled wearily and looked overly tired.
And Elfen was speechless. No had said for five centuries defected people had been living in the Vein and breeding. Five hundred years of abnormal breeding? The perfect and beautiful Children of the Glimpse had been birthing defects? Those who could not heal? It was impossible. Absolutely impossible! Plants and animals maybe, but not humans!
“At first,” No continued, “the Sell Fab Users wanted more people like us, so we crusaded. When travelers came through, we insisted they stay, or we held them captive.”
Her last words made Elfen involuntarily restrain his breath.
“But soon it became apparent the newcomers wanted to change us, so we killed them and ate them.”
Elfen tried very hard to appear calm and not mortified, but No was aware of his apprehension and relished it.
“It was about that time—when we became true cannibals—the elders changed the name of the Vein, to the 'Re-Legion'.” She observed Elfen’s grave state, and with a devious grin she taunted him, “Outsiders rarely leave alive.”
The golden chain of hearts shot a startling heat sensation up and down Freegirl’s left arm. She tensed her body and imagined conflict with the people of the Re-Legion. Two against how many? And these people weren’t stupid.
The thoughts of battle running through Freegirl’s mind seemed perfectly normal in this dim world.
Holding back his revulsion, Elfen kindly replied, “If you left this dark polluted place, maybe you would regain your healing powers.”
The old woman became offensive. “No! You were not listening! We came from the light, from families like yours! My ancestors did not find this place until after they realized they had health problems!” She began to choke and sputter.
A crippled youth hobbled forth from the shadows, clutching a rickety cane. “My mother needs to rest now,” said he. The colorless little boy had the wrinkle of pain on his forehead, and the daggers of fear in his eyes, but he was not without compassion.
He went to Elfen and handed the man a flat, square board and told him, “Take this. Hang it in front of your boat where it can be seen.” The poor child was wheezing, and it hurt Elfen to watch him. “You will make it through the rest of the tunnel without harm.”
Then he and Nolife dragged themselves into a hut under the shadows, and were gone from sight in moments.
Elfen held the banner the boy and given him, and slowly, with his shoulders rolled forward, he shuffled around the small lagoon with its neatly placed torches, and climbed back onto the Beast.
Freegirl was crying when he saw her. She had heard every word. It supported her unwanted Vision of the Inevitable Change. Sick angry people and their degenerative forces were the greatest opposition to paradise.
And what stronger tool for Change was there than opposition?
She felt Fear, an opposing force that ripped her Photopian nature. For her own family—and Freegirl herself—had experienced the healing blockages spoken by Nolife.
Elfen stood next to Freegirl watching her tears sympathetically. His head tilted to his shoulder, his eyebrows pointed to the center of his forehead, his pupils locked onto the ceiling and his brow gently wrinkled, as he expressed these words, “Cracked,” said the gentle man, in a low, tender tone. “Imaaagine it,” came his pained whisper. “These people are completely cracked.” He frowned and became very serious, his vocals breathing rough and weary. “They deny their given magic and do not trust their personal power.”
Elfen was wounded, as if the tragedy was his own.
But Freegirl was completely beyond herself. She grabbed her head into her gripping palms and squeezed, laboring with these words in her mind. Cracked. Cracked, he says. Cracked is nothing compared to the truth that lies beneath the crack. Cracked is but a place on the shell, a weak spot to be penetrated. The truth will always find its way to the surface. And what lives beneath the crack—the embryo that strives for the outside, the pressure that forces the fault line? What toxic opponent lurks inside, waiting to leap forth and destroy?
Freegirl swayed away from her companion, her new friend whose perception she could not understand, and still crying, went into the cabin.
Like always, as regular as ice in the arctic, her Nightmare screamed at her again. Hard and unforgiving it groaned, spewing misery of an unbelievable story of chaos—a destructive force designed by the Mother to create Change.
And one more time she suffered a pain she would admit to no one, a truth she could not comprehend, a reality she could not endure—Mother Nature shuddered for the balance, with the awakening of her Children.
Give roared the quakes!
Create sounded the tidal waves!
Touch fumed the volcanoes!
Trust screamed the skies!
In the darkness of the Re-Legion, in the desolation of Freegirl’s mind where the world erupted before her, the child from the golden mountain sank into her sleeping bag, heavily.
And saw.
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